I can't believe this week is already (almost) over! That's insane! Time is flying, which is something that I haven't been able to say since we moved to wonderful (<---sarcasm) Western Washington. I think we're finally, 10 months later, settling into this new idea of "normal". Our routine has changed so much since the move, and we've struggled getting a grip on it, but maybe, hopefully, we're on top of it now. I pray that this is the case! I thrive on routine. I also thrive on spontanait. Weird, right?!? But it's true. For me, there has to be a set routine, or else spontaneous events aren't spontaneous. Make sense?
When Jordan was born, I was a nazi about her schedule! Jordan napped and ate at the same times consistently, right as rain. Her routine was everything to our household. We planned lunch dates and grocery shopping trips around her nap schedule, and always made sure she got enough rest before we did anything. If Jordan was still napping, and we had other plans, we cancelled them. My parents watched her while we worked, and if I had to leave before she was awake, my Mom came over and waited for her to wake up. It was wonderful!
With Lucy, we just don't have that luxury. We have 2 kids to schedule Dr.'s appts for, dentist appts, one has a school schedule, etc. It's not practical to have such a strict routine. Though I just typed that, and I re-read it and know that's the way it is, it's still so aggravating for me to live it. I guess I got so caught up in this with Jordan because she was such an easy baby, and I felt at the time that the security of her schedule was what comforted her and made her so "easy". Lucy has been a little tart since she was in-utero, and after parenting Jordan so smoothly, I can't help but feel like I'm doing something wrong this time. I know in my heart of hearts that this is not the case, but sometimes I let myself go to that place of wonder. It's really devestating, and I should probably stop thinking like that. Keeping a strict schedule with her is out of the question. I can try to keep things similar day-to-day, but sometimes there will be outside agenda. The sooner I get over that, the sooner I can stop feeling guilty for something that's not really happening. And I mean, what am I gonna do? NEVER attend a women's bible study and skip necessary appointments because my kid is asleep? It even sounds ridiculous as I type it.
Doc is in a "mini-break" from school right now, meaning that he's only taking one class at a time for the next week, which is great! It free's up a little more time for Candyland, catching up on DVR (which we have for free for 6 months!! Hooray! I would never spend the money to keep it, but I'm sure enjoying this time with it!!) and lots of budget planning. We're doing Financial Peace University right now, the Dave Ramsey program, and I love it!! It's a great program to help with paying off debt, saving for emergencies and retirement, and mainly just holding yourself acocuntable for your spending. It's based on biblical principles regarding money, and it really puts things into perspective. Nothing like a little God-guilt to help me get a grip on my everyday Mcdonald's Diet Coke Fix! Doc and I's goal is to pay off every ounce of debt we have before leaving this duty station. From here, we'll go to Seminary for 3 years, Doc will be commissioned but in the Reserves, and our pay will go down to next to nothing. (And the girls and I will lose our health insurance) The Chaplaincy Program is the only Officer Program in the Navy that does not offer a paid program, so we have to be ready for that! We know that God will provide for us during that time, but we also know that He's embarked the wisdom of this on us for a reason. We must do our part.
I think I'm starting to enjoy my routine a little more as well. I've been getting up when Doc gets up, and showering and getting ready for the day before the girls wake up. Don't ask me why this was such a hard thing for me to start doing. Seriously. Don't ask me. It wounds my pride. I always knew it would be a good idea, but I was so dang tired and I refused to let go of that extra hour or two of sleep. The pattern that the old way created was really unpleasant though. Doc was always in bed an hour or two before I was, we didn't get enough time to just be alone together and have those necessary conversations (or sometimes arguments!) to keep our relationship in check, and I constantly felt like I had no time to myself. Doing this routine, the one where I get up 2 hours before my kids do, fixes all of that. It's still hard and I'm still so lazy about it sometimes, but I'm convinced that this is best for me and my family.
Do you peeps have routines? What are they? What do you do that works really well for you? I'd love to hear it! I know most of you readers are my Facebook peeps, so feel free to tell me there! I hope you all have a nice relaxing weekend coming up! 'Til next time.....
Thursday, October 20, 2011
Tuesday, October 11, 2011
Reminders
Things have been crazy around these parts for the last few weeks, hence my lack of blogging. We had my parents here visiting, which is always a great thing. We love them, we feel comfortable around them and we know they love being here with us. It was a great visit, and a reminder of how lucky we our to have our family. We were sad to see them go.
During the time they were here, Doc and I were able to sneak away a couple times without the kids. Any of you who know me well know that I absolutely live for date night! I live for sweet moments with my daughters, too, but taking care of this marriage is my first priority. (I know some of you are ready to bite my head off with some sort of "A mother's first priority is her children!!!!"-comment, but I believe that taking care of your marriage is directly connected to taking care of your children. 1. It sets an example for them in their future relationships, and 2. happy parents = happy children!) Doc and I are both so busy right now, him with working full-time and going to school full-time, and me with pretty much everything else, that it makes it difficult to have those quiet conversations that keep us in check, so we took full advantage of this time we had! We celebrated our wedding anniversary with a date night, and while we were sitting at the restaurant we exchanged cards we had bought for each other. We couldn't help but laugh, because the theme of both of our cards was basically this: Life sucks right now, but I love you so much and there's no way I could keep my head above water without you! I wish I could say that the theme was wine and roses, but that's really just not our reality right now. We're busy, we're paying off debt and downsizing our spending habits/lifestyle, and things really just aren't fun at all. But, we're madly in love and we've been blessed with so much more than money can buy. Sometimes we just need to sit down and remind each other of that.
I think that Doc and I's journey right now is really intense. Things have been really lonely and overwhelming lately. Doc is so busy with schoolwork that by the time we get a chance to have a conversation it's already bedtime. The girls and I miss him so much, and he misses us the same. We're all longing for time together, and there's just not alot of it. We still don't have near the friendships here that we had in Hawaii, and we're really missing that fellowship that we had there. We're in a time of growth and change, and we're preparing for even bigger changes yet to come (mainly financially, but also time-wise, priority shifts, etc). We're desperately trying to be more self-disciplined, and with every ounce of progress that comes there's a tempting desire to throw it all away and go back to the old way of doing things. This desire is familiar. It's come with every single small victory that we've conquered thus far in our Christian walk. It comes from the one who wants to see us stumble so badly that he can taste it. In those quiet moments that I have with my husband, we're able to remind ourselves of the victories we've already won. We can talk about our gameplan, and we can pray together and listen in the silence for God to lead us.
I'm thankful for the gentle reminders that a great date night give to us. It reminds us that even though there isn't alot of time for deep conversations (sometimes any conversation!) that we are still on the same page. We're still fighting the good fight, and we're loving each other through the tough parts. We're both exhausted, but we're praying for strength confidently, knowing God will see us through.
In the really dark parts of this journey, the lonely and overwhelming parts, I'm thankful for these reminders. We serve a mighty God, and I know that He'll get us through this valley in our life. It may not be pretty, but we're learning and growing and loving each other through it. I needed to be reminded of that.
During the time they were here, Doc and I were able to sneak away a couple times without the kids. Any of you who know me well know that I absolutely live for date night! I live for sweet moments with my daughters, too, but taking care of this marriage is my first priority. (I know some of you are ready to bite my head off with some sort of "A mother's first priority is her children!!!!"-comment, but I believe that taking care of your marriage is directly connected to taking care of your children. 1. It sets an example for them in their future relationships, and 2. happy parents = happy children!) Doc and I are both so busy right now, him with working full-time and going to school full-time, and me with pretty much everything else, that it makes it difficult to have those quiet conversations that keep us in check, so we took full advantage of this time we had! We celebrated our wedding anniversary with a date night, and while we were sitting at the restaurant we exchanged cards we had bought for each other. We couldn't help but laugh, because the theme of both of our cards was basically this: Life sucks right now, but I love you so much and there's no way I could keep my head above water without you! I wish I could say that the theme was wine and roses, but that's really just not our reality right now. We're busy, we're paying off debt and downsizing our spending habits/lifestyle, and things really just aren't fun at all. But, we're madly in love and we've been blessed with so much more than money can buy. Sometimes we just need to sit down and remind each other of that.
I think that Doc and I's journey right now is really intense. Things have been really lonely and overwhelming lately. Doc is so busy with schoolwork that by the time we get a chance to have a conversation it's already bedtime. The girls and I miss him so much, and he misses us the same. We're all longing for time together, and there's just not alot of it. We still don't have near the friendships here that we had in Hawaii, and we're really missing that fellowship that we had there. We're in a time of growth and change, and we're preparing for even bigger changes yet to come (mainly financially, but also time-wise, priority shifts, etc). We're desperately trying to be more self-disciplined, and with every ounce of progress that comes there's a tempting desire to throw it all away and go back to the old way of doing things. This desire is familiar. It's come with every single small victory that we've conquered thus far in our Christian walk. It comes from the one who wants to see us stumble so badly that he can taste it. In those quiet moments that I have with my husband, we're able to remind ourselves of the victories we've already won. We can talk about our gameplan, and we can pray together and listen in the silence for God to lead us.
I'm thankful for the gentle reminders that a great date night give to us. It reminds us that even though there isn't alot of time for deep conversations (sometimes any conversation!) that we are still on the same page. We're still fighting the good fight, and we're loving each other through the tough parts. We're both exhausted, but we're praying for strength confidently, knowing God will see us through.
In the really dark parts of this journey, the lonely and overwhelming parts, I'm thankful for these reminders. We serve a mighty God, and I know that He'll get us through this valley in our life. It may not be pretty, but we're learning and growing and loving each other through it. I needed to be reminded of that.
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